Do you think Pedro Gomez is satisfied with his lot in life? Does he feel out of place?
I saw him on SportsCenter last night, doing a little pre-game research bit for Game 1 of the world series. I just realized that for the last 3 years, up until August of this year, Pedro Gomez has only reported on Barry Bonds. Not the Giants, not big milestone home run for across Major League Baseball... just Barry Bonds.
No joke; when he first started covering the Barry Bonds saga, he had mostly black hair, with a small streak of grey. After reporting on the trials and tribulations that Barry Bonds has gone through, he's fully entered the Anderson Cooper- full head of silver hair zone. Is it total coincidence that he's reached the age of hair color transformation at the same time as this Barry Bonds era of his career, or has the Bonds drama actually stressed him? If so, what exactly stressed him: was it the lack of dignity that he suffered by going from being a sports journalist to almost a personal gossip columnist for Barry? Or did he vicariously feel the slings and arrows of the outrageous fortune that Bonds had to endure? Did he sympathize with the constant barbs and denigration that Barry had to endure from his detractors? Did the fact that Pedro and Barry's lives became so inexplicably intertwined lead to Gomez actually empathizing with him?
And how does he feel now? Is he relieved to finally be rid of the Bonds Crazy Train? Or does part of him miss it?
Right now, Pedro Gomez is in Boston, Massachusetts, part of ESPN's travel team, covering the World Championship of Major League Baseball: The World Series. To most sports journalists in the world, nay, most sports fans in the world, that is a dream come true. Is it possible that, deep down, Pedro Gomez instead wishes he was the lead reporter following the story of the tainted anti-hero of America's Pastime?
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Friday, August 10, 2007
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
Re: A History of Mistrust
regarding Wright Thompson's piece on ESPN.com, August 2007
note: this is very "train-of-thought"... I just wanted to make sure I wrote a response while the piece was still fresh in my head, and I might not have organized the thoughts as well as I could have.
Good Afternoon-
I would just like to say that I feel honored to have read your story on ESPN.com this morning. I've read so many pieces in the media pertaining to this story, and it's been almost sickening to see the wrath of the public's hatred without anyone even beginning to take into account the entire racial circumstances of the situation. Being an African-American youth (relative youth; I'm 25, and my parents were teenagers during the 60s) growing up in the Northeast, I feel like I've been blessed and cursed with regards to the significant racial undertones that do still permeate many American communities. At times, I almost feel like I've grown up with too much of a sense of naivete towards these feelings that are so common in the South because of the acceptance (real or facade? probably a little of both) of integration in my neighborhoods. But with the innocence and lack of experience of overt malevolent racist thoughts and actions, my naive view of the world is hiding me not only from what my ancestors had to deal with on a daily basis, but what some of our black brother and sisters still deal with today in given areas south of the Mason-Dixon line.
Your piece has forced me to experience a rainbow of emotions. I feel angered that someone as talented as Michael Vick, someone who was placed on a pedestal because of his amazing ability, can be vilified so quickly without being given the chance to defend himself. I feel saddened that the monumental steps that Martin, Malcolm, and so many other strong activists and leaders from decades past are almost insignificant when one realizes that there is still so much deep-rooted, irrational hatred for man towards his fellow man. I feel disappointed when I realize how many people don't understand this strong racist undertone still exists, even though there aren't the obvious displays of racism as there were in generations past. But I also feel a sense of hope. I feel proud that there are still men and women who will take up the challenge to educate the public to the state of affairs that still exists; that even though integration is law, that de facto segregation still has a strong place in the old Jim Crow South, and that it's not going to go away or get better with effort. I feel stronger knowing that a family such as the Abernathys, with such strong ties to the Movement of the 60s and 70s, has not slowed away from being active in their community, nor have they shied away from the controversy that they might encounter by speaking their mind.
Thank you, Mr. Thompson, for providing not only the African-American community but the entire country (via espn, at least) with an educated look at the dark past of our nation, and for reminding all of your readers that although the "Civil Rights Movement" has technically passed, the idea of Jim Crow is still prevalent in some areas and that everyone still has to continue to help eliminate that idea of overt and latent racial biases in their everyday lives.
JJ
note: this is very "train-of-thought"... I just wanted to make sure I wrote a response while the piece was still fresh in my head, and I might not have organized the thoughts as well as I could have.
Good Afternoon-
I would just like to say that I feel honored to have read your story on ESPN.com this morning. I've read so many pieces in the media pertaining to this story, and it's been almost sickening to see the wrath of the public's hatred without anyone even beginning to take into account the entire racial circumstances of the situation. Being an African-American youth (relative youth; I'm 25, and my parents were teenagers during the 60s) growing up in the Northeast, I feel like I've been blessed and cursed with regards to the significant racial undertones that do still permeate many American communities. At times, I almost feel like I've grown up with too much of a sense of naivete towards these feelings that are so common in the South because of the acceptance (real or facade? probably a little of both) of integration in my neighborhoods. But with the innocence and lack of experience of overt malevolent racist thoughts and actions, my naive view of the world is hiding me not only from what my ancestors had to deal with on a daily basis, but what some of our black brother and sisters still deal with today in given areas south of the Mason-Dixon line.
Your piece has forced me to experience a rainbow of emotions. I feel angered that someone as talented as Michael Vick, someone who was placed on a pedestal because of his amazing ability, can be vilified so quickly without being given the chance to defend himself. I feel saddened that the monumental steps that Martin, Malcolm, and so many other strong activists and leaders from decades past are almost insignificant when one realizes that there is still so much deep-rooted, irrational hatred for man towards his fellow man. I feel disappointed when I realize how many people don't understand this strong racist undertone still exists, even though there aren't the obvious displays of racism as there were in generations past. But I also feel a sense of hope. I feel proud that there are still men and women who will take up the challenge to educate the public to the state of affairs that still exists; that even though integration is law, that de facto segregation still has a strong place in the old Jim Crow South, and that it's not going to go away or get better with effort. I feel stronger knowing that a family such as the Abernathys, with such strong ties to the Movement of the 60s and 70s, has not slowed away from being active in their community, nor have they shied away from the controversy that they might encounter by speaking their mind.
Thank you, Mr. Thompson, for providing not only the African-American community but the entire country (via espn, at least) with an educated look at the dark past of our nation, and for reminding all of your readers that although the "Civil Rights Movement" has technically passed, the idea of Jim Crow is still prevalent in some areas and that everyone still has to continue to help eliminate that idea of overt and latent racial biases in their everyday lives.
JJ
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
you see all these movies
(originally written 2/21/2004)
You see all these movies, books, tv shows
With men being men
The ultimate man
Pure
No flaws
No problems
Strong principles
Never wavering
But in the real world, its not like that
No one has principles
Everyone wavers
And yet all these people experience “Greatness”
“glory”
“fame”
and I try and stick to what I think is right
what is pure in the world
what is right…
what is right…
and I get screwed over
nothing goes right for me
people treat me like shit
and I find amusement in trying to treat other people like shit
but I shouldn’t
I don’t really want to
I feel like I’m a good person
I was a good person
I just want to be a good person again
You see all these movies, books, tv shows
With men being men
The ultimate man
Pure
No flaws
No problems
Strong principles
Never wavering
But in the real world, its not like that
No one has principles
Everyone wavers
And yet all these people experience “Greatness”
“glory”
“fame”
and I try and stick to what I think is right
what is pure in the world
what is right…
what is right…
and I get screwed over
nothing goes right for me
people treat me like shit
and I find amusement in trying to treat other people like shit
but I shouldn’t
I don’t really want to
I feel like I’m a good person
I was a good person
I just want to be a good person again
Friday, July 13, 2007
Joe Buckman
*character sketch for my upcoming story
I'm 35, overweight and balding, and i have a penchant for biting sarcasm. I just purchased my first pair of glasses in 15 years; apparently aviator prescription glasses are no longer in style. I'm clever as hell but lonely as a rock. I grew up in Ann Arbor, and have spent pretty much every day of my life in michigan, save a vacation I took when I was twelve (my little sister was five) to disney world and a spring break trip i took during college to visit san diego.
I like sushi but HATE fish. I like thai food but am allergic to peanuts. I write poetry but I am unable to feel emotions. I love baseball but I hate hot weather. I'm going to vote for Obama even though I know he can't win. I'm an OSU fan even though I ride past the Big House on my bike every day.
...and I just inherited 325 million dollars, but have no friends or family.
I'm 35, overweight and balding, and i have a penchant for biting sarcasm. I just purchased my first pair of glasses in 15 years; apparently aviator prescription glasses are no longer in style. I'm clever as hell but lonely as a rock. I grew up in Ann Arbor, and have spent pretty much every day of my life in michigan, save a vacation I took when I was twelve (my little sister was five) to disney world and a spring break trip i took during college to visit san diego.
I like sushi but HATE fish. I like thai food but am allergic to peanuts. I write poetry but I am unable to feel emotions. I love baseball but I hate hot weather. I'm going to vote for Obama even though I know he can't win. I'm an OSU fan even though I ride past the Big House on my bike every day.
...and I just inherited 325 million dollars, but have no friends or family.
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Enter Sandman
"Here's what we'll tell our kids: He looked like an alien, and threw like a god. He had one pitch -- and with that one pitch, like David with one rock in a slingshot, he could fell any foe. With that one pitch he could escape any danger. With that one pitch he could intimidate any lineup. With that one pitch he won world titles. With that one pitch he pitched his way to the Hall of Fame. With that one pitch he performed surgery. With that one pitch he wrote poems. With that one pitch he sang songs. With that one pitch he saved souls and converted non-believers, and brought peace to the boroughs and joy to the masses. And we will not be exaggerating."
--Eric Neel, espn.com
--Eric Neel, espn.com
Friday, September 22, 2006
variations on a theme, howard dean style
Howard Dean Speaking to Supporters in Iowa, 2004
Dave Chappelle as Howard Dean:
Joey Porter as Dave Chappelle as Howard Dean
Dave Chappelle as Howard Dean:
Joey Porter as Dave Chappelle as Howard Dean
Thursday, September 21, 2006
another copout
I swear, I'm going to post regular entries in this soon... just as soon as I figure out my life. Priorities: life, then blog. Fair enough? Sweet.
As recommended by RF. (yeah, this song is kinda lame, soft, sappy, etc., but i can still kick your ass. remember that)
The Shins - Pink Bullets
As recommended by RF. (yeah, this song is kinda lame, soft, sappy, etc., but i can still kick your ass. remember that)
The Shins - Pink Bullets
Saturday, August 26, 2006
random discovery #2
Gnarls Barkley. As much as I dislike trendy music (because I'm not cool enough to be trendy), these guys are awesome. Their music has an original flavor to it, and they're crazy. It's the good kind of crazy; the kind of crazy that I call myself.
And these outfits are amazing.
And these outfits are amazing.
random discovery
Fact: This is a statue located in the Boston Public Gardens.Fact: This statue is a monument to the first surgical procedure which used an anaesthetic.
Fact: I saw this statue for the first time two weeks ago.
Fact: I just finished a novel which referenced this fairly esoteric piece of art two days ago.
Hi ho.
Saturday, July 15, 2006
why can't i own a canadian?
shamelessly stolen from someone else:
Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a east coast resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:
Dear Dr. Laura:
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them:
When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19- 24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?
Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?
I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.
Your devoted fan,
Jim
Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a east coast resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:
Dear Dr. Laura:
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them:
When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19- 24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?
Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?
I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.
Your devoted fan,
Jim
Friday, June 30, 2006
pink's a cool color
writing is overrated.
There's about 900 words worth of material; the upload made it a little blurrier than my actual pic, so I won't say it's worth a thousand words.
Not too shabby though. I like it.
Friday, June 23, 2006
my greatest post ever
To all my adoring fans bored out their mind... you can thank me later.
Classics from our childhood:
It's too bad we don't have the nintendo gun for this bad boy...
Classics from our childhood:
It's too bad we don't have the nintendo gun for this bad boy...
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
does humor lie in the eye of the beholder?
Yes. I know. It almost makes one feel guilty. Honestly, though, I don't feel that bad. I laugh at my own imperfections (of which there are many) on a daily basis, and I truly believe that if we can't laugh at certain things, and constantly grovel to the overwhelming guilt trip of political correctness, then what's the point in laughing at anything?
I know that I'm a good person. As long as I know that my heart's in the right place, I'll laugh at anyone.
how's that for my first post in 4 months?
Friday, March 10, 2006
stud
Only when you're playing with MIT kids can you get this kind of recognition. I bet they're the kind of kids that would beg for sex. I would know; we can smell our own.
score one for clogged arteries!
I'll state for the record that I think White Castle hamburgers are unbelieveably delicious. That being said, this concoction developed by the concession department of the Gateway Grizzlies minor league baseball team might be the most disgusting thing that I've ever heard of. I like burgers, cheese, bacon, and Krispy Kreme donuts, but I'd be scared to have all of those things in the same day, not to mention at the same time. American obesity rules!!!
Monday, March 06, 2006
good times, great oldies.
This "testimonial", if you will, is actually a month old, but I haven't posted anything in a while and felt like adding something.
Adam is 25 years old today. It seems weird to say, but I've known him for 10 years now, and probably been close friends with him for about 9 of those. Out of all the friends I've made over the past 10 years, I've probably seen Adam the least, and yet I still feel like he's a closer friend to me than people I see every week. His off-color remarks that make no sense to anyone except for maybe 4 people in the world, his willingless to leave his country behind in order to experience the world, and introducing me to the aqua teen hunger force are just 3 of the 20681 reasons why i miss this guy much more than any guy should ever miss any other guy. Um... yeah... I'm not sure who just wrote this emotional testimonial... why is it so dusty in here? eyes... watering... er... yeah. safari joe does indeed do it again.
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
gonzo
Disclaimer:
I don't like cheezy tributes.
I'm not a writer.
I don't think that drug or alcohol references automatically make anything/anyone cool.
Today is the one-year anniversary of the passing of Hunter S. Thompson, commonly referred to as the father of "gonzo journalism". I'm not going to claim that I've known about him forever, and I'm not going to say that I was reading his books and articles "before it was cool". But Hunter is probably the one person who ever made me want to write. Granted, I've always enjoyed reading throughout my life, and I wouldn't classify Hunter's works as the greatest literary works I've read. But what makes his work stand out from the most things I've read is that it really feels like I'm reading Hunter S. Thompson on the page. I don't mean seeing his thoughts, translated into words; I feel like I can see Hunter himself. When he presents his opinions, I don't have to think about phrases and sentences and figure out what he's trying to say; I feel like they're already in my head.
There are many of Hunter's ideas and opinions that I agree with, and there are many that I just don't get. But I do know that I loved reading about his political aspirations, drug-induced memoirs, gambling wins and losses, and his devout love of sports. And even though I'm sure there are many people out there who'll probably try to mimic his style (myself included, at times), there will never be another Hunter.
"Some may never live, but the crazy never die."
-HST
Here's to being crazy.
I don't like cheezy tributes.
I'm not a writer.
I don't think that drug or alcohol references automatically make anything/anyone cool.
Today is the one-year anniversary of the passing of Hunter S. Thompson, commonly referred to as the father of "gonzo journalism". I'm not going to claim that I've known about him forever, and I'm not going to say that I was reading his books and articles "before it was cool". But Hunter is probably the one person who ever made me want to write. Granted, I've always enjoyed reading throughout my life, and I wouldn't classify Hunter's works as the greatest literary works I've read. But what makes his work stand out from the most things I've read is that it really feels like I'm reading Hunter S. Thompson on the page. I don't mean seeing his thoughts, translated into words; I feel like I can see Hunter himself. When he presents his opinions, I don't have to think about phrases and sentences and figure out what he's trying to say; I feel like they're already in my head.
There are many of Hunter's ideas and opinions that I agree with, and there are many that I just don't get. But I do know that I loved reading about his political aspirations, drug-induced memoirs, gambling wins and losses, and his devout love of sports. And even though I'm sure there are many people out there who'll probably try to mimic his style (myself included, at times), there will never be another Hunter.
"Some may never live, but the crazy never die."
-HST
Here's to being crazy.
Friday, February 17, 2006
misplaced apology
Taking a break from all that garbage that I've been writing about this week, I'm going to give Harry Whittington, the object of D-Chen's target practice last weekend, a little shoutout. I read this in the New York Times this morning:
Secondly... this dude was shot in the face and chest, and he apologized to the guy that shot him?! If I were in that position, I think I'd be more in the mindset of Jules, from Pulp Fiction: "That ain't right, man. Motherfucker do that to me, he better paralyze my ass, 'cause I'd kill a motherfucker."
I guess Chen-dog is a big fan of Rainier Wolfcastle; he just wanted to go to that Texas ranch, "tear it down, and turn it into a nature reserve where I will hunt the most dangerous game of all...man."
First of all, it wasn't even like this was skilled hunting; these old men were wandering around in a field where slow, dimwitted, flightless birds walk around and bump into each other. If you're going to hunt, go track deer or ducks or something.CORPUS CHRISTI, Texas (AP) -- The lawyer shot by Vice President Dick Cheney during a hunting trip was being discharged from a hospital on Friday and told reporters he was sorry for all the trouble Cheney had faced over the past week.
"We all assume certain risks in what we do, in what activities we pursue," Whittington, 78, said as he stood outside the hospital, his face clearly bruised.
"Accidents do and will happen," he said.
Whittington thanked the hospital staff. He also said he was sorry for all the difficulty the vice president and his family had faced. He said the past weekend encompassed "a cloud of misfortune and sadness."
Secondly... this dude was shot in the face and chest, and he apologized to the guy that shot him?! If I were in that position, I think I'd be more in the mindset of Jules, from Pulp Fiction: "That ain't right, man. Motherfucker do that to me, he better paralyze my ass, 'cause I'd kill a motherfucker."
I guess Chen-dog is a big fan of Rainier Wolfcastle; he just wanted to go to that Texas ranch, "tear it down, and turn it into a nature reserve where I will hunt the most dangerous game of all...man."
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
love, actually (pt. 2)
Continuing from yesterday's post, I'll continue to dissect this crazy little thing called love with a distinctly different movie than the 1942 classic Casablanca: Kevin Smith's Chasing Amy. It's your typical boy-meets-girl, boy-falls-in-love, boy-finds-out-that-girl-is-gay, boy-professes-love-anyway, girl-falls-in-love-with-boy-anyway, boy-finds-out-he-isn't-girl's-first-heterosexual-experience, boy-can't-deal-with-his-exlesbian-girlfriend-having-slept-with-other-men, boy-says-multiple-hurtful-things, boy-forgets-that-he-loves-girl-for-her-personality-and-not-her-sexual-history, boy-ruins-relationship-with-soulmate story.
In every relationship (well, every relationship that ends), there are five distinct parts: the courtship phase, the newlywed phase, the long haul, the beginning of the end, and the breakup. What I like about CA is the fact that Smith really doesn't glorify most of these scenes. Granted, the whole idea of a lesbian falling in love with a man might be a little outlandish (for any guy but me, anyway). I'll admit that. But Smith's description of the emotional transitions that each character goes through really takes you through the trials that guys and gals experience during a relationship.
When Holden (Ben Affleck) and Alyssa (Joey Lauren Adams) first meet, Holden breaks out cheesy line after cheesy line, and most of them flop horribly. For any guy who's ever tried to win over a girl without booze or rohypnol, this is a situation that is disturbing familiar. Even when you think that she might be sort of into you, trying to carry on a conversation with a girl you're trying to win over is nearly impossible because a) guys are idiots, b) girls are insane, c) you're second guessing everything you're saying to make sure that you're not coming across as an idiot, and d) the girl (she's crazy, remember) is probably trying to act like she's not as interested as she is.
Once their relationship starts, their romance (like most) becomes all-consuming; they're making out all the time, they're forgoing time with everyone else to be with each other... they pretty much forget that the outside world exists. Now, I'm not one to rip into wanting to spend a lot of time with a significant other, and I'm definitely not about to say that having sex all the time is a bad thing. And while I'm sure Kevin Smith isn't a "love-hater", he doesn't hesitate to display the strain that their engrossing relationship has on their outside friendships. Alyssa's close knit circle of friends and co-workers begin to show visible annoyance when she starts hanging out with them less and less (as well as the fact that she's no longer playing for Team Lesbian). Holden's roommate, comic book co-creator and best friend Banky (Jason Lee) even goes so far as to say that their friendship is seriously at risk because of the nonstop attention that he's giving his new girlfriend.
Banky: Everybody has an agenda. Everyone.
Holden: Yourself?
Banky: My agenda is to watch your back.
Holden: To what end?
Banky: To insure that all this time we've spent together, building something, wasn't wasted.
Holden: She's not going to ruin the comic.
Banky: I wasn't talking about the comic.
Because Kevin Smith is like me and doesn't appreciate 3-hour long movies, we don't catch a lot of the "long haul"-phase of their relationship, but we can pretty much assume that's it the same as the newlywed phase, but toned down a bit. Which leads us to... the beginning of the end. Depending on the people involved, this can happen in a variety of ways; one of the relationshipeers (I make up words... so what?) might start to feel inadequate, underappreciated, smothered, or one probably a million other reasons. In CA, the relationship begins to unravel when our hero comes upon a rumor that his "untouched by another man" girl has indeed experimented with heterosexuality in her younger years.
Some people might have found my Casablanca questioning of love and romance overly skewed towards making women the antagonists in relationships. Well, I stand by that opinion, because those are the feelings that dynamics of Rick and Ilsa elicited in me. And now, with Chasing Amy, I'm ready to admit that the demise of the primary relationship in this movie was caused primarily by the guy. When Holden finds out that he isn't the first man to have sex with Alyssa, he starts freaking out, yelling at her, calling her a "whore"; he's out for blood with this breakup. His irrational ranting and raving at her has nothing to do with their current relationship; it's merely a weird and bizarre insecurity inside himself that's made him erupt with an inordinate amount of intense passion. A level of passion which, at the beginning of their relationship, he had used to love her with.
The reason that this breakup scene hurts so much is that, over the course of the movie, Smith shows how well Alyssa and Holden are together. He doesn't just make up some cheesy "love at first sight" garbage, and then force the audience to trust him that they're kindred spirits. He shows them discussing their similar interests. He shows their playful banter with each other. He shows their ability to make fun of each other in a lighthearted way. And then, once they hook up, you see not just that they're intensely attracted to each other physically, but that they genuinely feel more complete when they're together and are in one another's arms.
So... what's the moral of this story? That quality relationships are so hard to come by that the only place a guy can find a quality girlfriend is in the lesbian community? Probably not; I think, in that sense, Smith's just trying to say that finding that you never know where you might find that perfect person... whether its at a comic book convention, Jimmy Buffet concert, at a Fourth of July party, or just walking across a bridge with a corned beef sandwich at 1am. Is the moral that guys are inherently insecure beings who need their egos padded constantly? That's definitely possible, because guys are idiots and as much as we want to be seen as tough guys, it's only to make girls want to be protected by us (if that makes any sense at all).
But I think the main thing that Kevin Smith is trying to say with this movie is that relationships are difficult; as great and happy and comfortable as your partner might make you feel, it still takes a lot of work to keep a relationship healthy and strong. There'll probably be times when one of the partners might not visibly show as much affection as he (i mean, err... he or she) did during the courtship and newlywed phases of the relationship; he (or she) has to remember that although he (or she) might still feel the same way, he (or she) has to work at showing that he (or she) feels the same way. There might be a time when one of the partners feels that she (or he) isn't getting to spend enough time with the other; she (or he) should remember that although her (or his) partner may love her (or him) more than anyone else in the world, the two of them are still individuals, and that the "individual" version of the partner is the person that she initially fell in love with.
Two love analyses, two broken relationships... this is no good.
Stay tuned for Part III, boys and girls... hopefully I can find something good to say about relationships...
-Editor's Note: This sequence of epistles on love is being indefinitely suspended due to... um... not really wanting to do it anymore. However, I will pick it up again if I get positive feedback on the first two entries or an overwhelming bunch of requests for a continuation. Mahalo.
In every relationship (well, every relationship that ends), there are five distinct parts: the courtship phase, the newlywed phase, the long haul, the beginning of the end, and the breakup. What I like about CA is the fact that Smith really doesn't glorify most of these scenes. Granted, the whole idea of a lesbian falling in love with a man might be a little outlandish (for any guy but me, anyway). I'll admit that. But Smith's description of the emotional transitions that each character goes through really takes you through the trials that guys and gals experience during a relationship.
When Holden (Ben Affleck) and Alyssa (Joey Lauren Adams) first meet, Holden breaks out cheesy line after cheesy line, and most of them flop horribly. For any guy who's ever tried to win over a girl without booze or rohypnol, this is a situation that is disturbing familiar. Even when you think that she might be sort of into you, trying to carry on a conversation with a girl you're trying to win over is nearly impossible because a) guys are idiots, b) girls are insane, c) you're second guessing everything you're saying to make sure that you're not coming across as an idiot, and d) the girl (she's crazy, remember) is probably trying to act like she's not as interested as she is.
Once their relationship starts, their romance (like most) becomes all-consuming; they're making out all the time, they're forgoing time with everyone else to be with each other... they pretty much forget that the outside world exists. Now, I'm not one to rip into wanting to spend a lot of time with a significant other, and I'm definitely not about to say that having sex all the time is a bad thing. And while I'm sure Kevin Smith isn't a "love-hater", he doesn't hesitate to display the strain that their engrossing relationship has on their outside friendships. Alyssa's close knit circle of friends and co-workers begin to show visible annoyance when she starts hanging out with them less and less (as well as the fact that she's no longer playing for Team Lesbian). Holden's roommate, comic book co-creator and best friend Banky (Jason Lee) even goes so far as to say that their friendship is seriously at risk because of the nonstop attention that he's giving his new girlfriend.
Banky: Everybody has an agenda. Everyone.
Holden: Yourself?
Banky: My agenda is to watch your back.
Holden: To what end?
Banky: To insure that all this time we've spent together, building something, wasn't wasted.
Holden: She's not going to ruin the comic.
Banky: I wasn't talking about the comic.
Because Kevin Smith is like me and doesn't appreciate 3-hour long movies, we don't catch a lot of the "long haul"-phase of their relationship, but we can pretty much assume that's it the same as the newlywed phase, but toned down a bit. Which leads us to... the beginning of the end. Depending on the people involved, this can happen in a variety of ways; one of the relationshipeers (I make up words... so what?) might start to feel inadequate, underappreciated, smothered, or one probably a million other reasons. In CA, the relationship begins to unravel when our hero comes upon a rumor that his "untouched by another man" girl has indeed experimented with heterosexuality in her younger years.
Some people might have found my Casablanca questioning of love and romance overly skewed towards making women the antagonists in relationships. Well, I stand by that opinion, because those are the feelings that dynamics of Rick and Ilsa elicited in me. And now, with Chasing Amy, I'm ready to admit that the demise of the primary relationship in this movie was caused primarily by the guy. When Holden finds out that he isn't the first man to have sex with Alyssa, he starts freaking out, yelling at her, calling her a "whore"; he's out for blood with this breakup. His irrational ranting and raving at her has nothing to do with their current relationship; it's merely a weird and bizarre insecurity inside himself that's made him erupt with an inordinate amount of intense passion. A level of passion which, at the beginning of their relationship, he had used to love her with.
The reason that this breakup scene hurts so much is that, over the course of the movie, Smith shows how well Alyssa and Holden are together. He doesn't just make up some cheesy "love at first sight" garbage, and then force the audience to trust him that they're kindred spirits. He shows them discussing their similar interests. He shows their playful banter with each other. He shows their ability to make fun of each other in a lighthearted way. And then, once they hook up, you see not just that they're intensely attracted to each other physically, but that they genuinely feel more complete when they're together and are in one another's arms.
So... what's the moral of this story? That quality relationships are so hard to come by that the only place a guy can find a quality girlfriend is in the lesbian community? Probably not; I think, in that sense, Smith's just trying to say that finding that you never know where you might find that perfect person... whether its at a comic book convention, Jimmy Buffet concert, at a Fourth of July party, or just walking across a bridge with a corned beef sandwich at 1am. Is the moral that guys are inherently insecure beings who need their egos padded constantly? That's definitely possible, because guys are idiots and as much as we want to be seen as tough guys, it's only to make girls want to be protected by us (if that makes any sense at all).
But I think the main thing that Kevin Smith is trying to say with this movie is that relationships are difficult; as great and happy and comfortable as your partner might make you feel, it still takes a lot of work to keep a relationship healthy and strong. There'll probably be times when one of the partners might not visibly show as much affection as he (i mean, err... he or she) did during the courtship and newlywed phases of the relationship; he (or she) has to remember that although he (or she) might still feel the same way, he (or she) has to work at showing that he (or she) feels the same way. There might be a time when one of the partners feels that she (or he) isn't getting to spend enough time with the other; she (or he) should remember that although her (or his) partner may love her (or him) more than anyone else in the world, the two of them are still individuals, and that the "individual" version of the partner is the person that she initially fell in love with.
Two love analyses, two broken relationships... this is no good.
-Editor's Note: This sequence of epistles on love is being indefinitely suspended due to... um... not really wanting to do it anymore. However, I will pick it up again if I get positive feedback on the first two entries or an overwhelming bunch of requests for a continuation. Mahalo.
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