One of my dreams has always been to be a contestant on "The Price is Right". I feel like, after watching this amazing testament to consumerism on countless sick days over the last 24 years, I have an uncanny ability to make the correct guess or select the proper strategy for every game that they host. Plinko? I'm hitting the $10k or $25k slot every time; Cliff Hanger? That little dude isn't going over the edge on my watch. Dice Game? I could roll those fuzzy dice and pick the right numbers in my sleep. I'm fairly sure that most of the people who actually make on to the show share this sentiment. Now, what I don't understand, is how every single contestant selected for a given game always asks the audience for help with their task. Every single one!!
Why!?! You've been watching this show for years, constantly telling yourself "oh man, I would've picked $14.95... everyone knows that 4 boxes of pancake mix wouldn't cost $24.95... idiot!", and then as soon as you're up on the stage next to Bob, you're asking stoned college kids and housewives on vacations for advice?! Stick with your gut! Make your own choices!
Is it possible that this can viewed as a deeper insight into the human persona? Is it possible that we actually know the correct answers to life's questions most of the time, but because we have such a fear of rejection we decide to succumb to the collective will of our peers and colleagues? Or, on the other hand, is it possible that in solitude, we like to believe that we are smarter than we are, but when presented with a challenge in a public setting, we are humbled by the fact that we truly don't know anything?
The Price is Right... ponderous.
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
Tuesday, November 22, 2005
Thursday, November 10, 2005
billy goats gruff is crap.
Recently, one of my friends included a nice little writeup on her blog about an encounter between Muhammad Ali and the president of our fair country. The details are insignificant to this post (check out SR's post anyway though), but there was a reference to the fairy tale of The Billy Goats Gruff. (If you're a little rusty, here's a refresher)
Most fairy tales have morals... don't underestimate people/don't be overly cocky (tortoise and the hare), don't lie (the boy who cried wolf), etc... but what exactly was the precautionary measure exemplified in The Billy Goats Gruff?
JJ: what do you think the moral of the billy goats gruff story is?
SR: i'm thinking it's travel in packs?
SR: or don't be a dumb troll and let others walk through your yard
JJ: so its saying, give the goats some shit even if they're small and cute because they're really only out to fuck you over
JJ: they'll smile to your face, and then get their enforcer to kick your ass
JJ: dude, those goats are dirty
JJ: i'm getting more and more sympathetic for the troll
SR: i think the message is actually... don't fuck with anyone because there's always someone bigger than you
SR: so it's like a negatively put golden rule
SR: don't fuck with anyone if you don't wanna be fucked with
SR: i think that's a fair message
JJ: ok, but look at it this way
JJ: lets pretend the troll's not a "troll", per se
JJ: he's just a normal dude who keeps to himself
JJ: first of all, he's got this really crappy apartment below ground level that's probably reeking of moisture
JJ: then he's got these uppity little punks traipsing all over his ceiling, making a buttload of noise when he just wants some peace and quiet
JJ: he voices his complaints, but then he just settles down and doesn't worry about the first or second noisemakers
JJ: when he finally gets the cojones to step up to one of these ass-clowns, he gets his ass beat
JJ: you know, the story makes its point, literally
JJ: "don't let punks walk over you"
JJ: if you let one person do it
JJ: then you're just inviting more people to do it
JJ: and eventually, its going to come back to bite you in the ass
Most fairy tales have morals... don't underestimate people/don't be overly cocky (tortoise and the hare), don't lie (the boy who cried wolf), etc... but what exactly was the precautionary measure exemplified in The Billy Goats Gruff?
JJ: what do you think the moral of the billy goats gruff story is?
SR: i'm thinking it's travel in packs?
SR: or don't be a dumb troll and let others walk through your yard
JJ: so its saying, give the goats some shit even if they're small and cute because they're really only out to fuck you over
JJ: they'll smile to your face, and then get their enforcer to kick your ass
JJ: dude, those goats are dirty
JJ: i'm getting more and more sympathetic for the troll
SR: i think the message is actually... don't fuck with anyone because there's always someone bigger than you
SR: so it's like a negatively put golden rule
SR: don't fuck with anyone if you don't wanna be fucked with
SR: i think that's a fair message
JJ: ok, but look at it this way
JJ: lets pretend the troll's not a "troll", per se
JJ: he's just a normal dude who keeps to himself
JJ: first of all, he's got this really crappy apartment below ground level that's probably reeking of moisture
JJ: then he's got these uppity little punks traipsing all over his ceiling, making a buttload of noise when he just wants some peace and quiet
JJ: he voices his complaints, but then he just settles down and doesn't worry about the first or second noisemakers
JJ: when he finally gets the cojones to step up to one of these ass-clowns, he gets his ass beat
JJ: you know, the story makes its point, literally
JJ: "don't let punks walk over you"
JJ: if you let one person do it
JJ: then you're just inviting more people to do it
JJ: and eventually, its going to come back to bite you in the ass
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
bee stings, and the meaning of life
Sometimes, things don't go the way you want; you miss a bus, you forget to buy toilet paper... whatever. Everyone deals with these little things everyday. But what do you do when something catastrophic happens? What do you do when the person who you thought you'd spend the rest of your life with up and walks out the door? What do you do when one of your best friends is a victim in a horrific car accident? What do you do when the man who made you what you are (both literally and figuratively), who has literally known you since the second you were born, is taken from you far too early?
These scenarios all seem way too unlikely to happen randomly, out of the blue, don't they? Fairly recently, I was like most people; growing up in the suburbs, I had a latent, subtle feeling of invincibility. Now, I know what a lot of you are saying: "I've never felt invincible; I know that I have limitations on everything that I do." But be honest with yourselves... do you really think that you're in any imminent danger right now? Will you be in danger by the end of the day? What about your friends and family? Of course not; they're all working, or taking classes, and then they're going home to probably have an uneventful night. One of them might be a little sick, one might stub their toe after dinner, and one of them might go out to a club, but no one's anticipating anything of any significance to happen.
Now think about what might happen if one of the more intense "catastrophic" events that I described earlier happened to you or a loved one. How would you feel? I don't know about you, but I, aside from succumbing to overwhelming grief, would immediately have serious thoughts about my own mortality . How do you deal with everyday functioning when someone that's been as close to you as your right hand is suddenly chopped out of your life? How do you drive to work in the morning when you know that, on a street very much like the one you're driving down, someone deeply close to your heart has lost the ability walk? Not only do these things frighten/scare/anger you when you first hear about them, but they continue to hurt everytime you're reminded of them. If, through some unfortunate circumstance, you were to experience more than one of these tragedies in a short period of time, how would you cope with them?
For many people (myself included), I think the initial reaction would be to just stop. Stop working. Stop going out. Stop reading. Stop doing whatever it is that makes you happy. The overwhelming nature of it all would just be too much. And you might even be able to make some sort of depressing rationalization for everything: "Well, if I get hit by a car tomorrow, what's the point of me working extra long hours at the office today?" "If there's a chance that I might just suddenly collapse from a heart attack in a couple years, why should I even apply to grad school?"
And honestly, if someone had presented me with those hypotheticals, I'm not sure how I'd respond. I mean, you can say "Shut up, that's just really depressing talk" or "Don't say things like that, you don't really mean that". But you really can see how someone might want to just slink off into nothingness, realizing that drastic, monumental changes can happen to you that are 100% out of your control. It's a pretty terrifying realization.
But then, I had an epiphany (not an epiphany at all, actually... I read an article on ESPN, hahaha). And with this epiphany, I realized the meaning of life. Yes, I said it, the meaning of life. And it resides in the fact that although huge, devastating things can happen, life is really all about the little things. Here's a little excerpt from the article (it's a little football-oriented; deal with it):
So yes, physical and emotional trauma happens. It's terrible. But here's the thing; what makes losing someone hurt so much is the fact that we were able to have so many good memories with them. So, yes it still hurts me more than anything to think about the painful experiences that I've had in the not-too-distant past. But I know that life isn't about dwelling on the pain that you've felt. It's about sharing memories of the good times. And its about continuing to make more and more good memories, because at the end of the day, that's all you really have.
And quite frankly, that's all you need.
(here's a link to today's inspiration... this dude's a beast, and my hero of the week)
These scenarios all seem way too unlikely to happen randomly, out of the blue, don't they? Fairly recently, I was like most people; growing up in the suburbs, I had a latent, subtle feeling of invincibility. Now, I know what a lot of you are saying: "I've never felt invincible; I know that I have limitations on everything that I do." But be honest with yourselves... do you really think that you're in any imminent danger right now? Will you be in danger by the end of the day? What about your friends and family? Of course not; they're all working, or taking classes, and then they're going home to probably have an uneventful night. One of them might be a little sick, one might stub their toe after dinner, and one of them might go out to a club, but no one's anticipating anything of any significance to happen.
Now think about what might happen if one of the more intense "catastrophic" events that I described earlier happened to you or a loved one. How would you feel? I don't know about you, but I, aside from succumbing to overwhelming grief, would immediately have serious thoughts about my own mortality . How do you deal with everyday functioning when someone that's been as close to you as your right hand is suddenly chopped out of your life? How do you drive to work in the morning when you know that, on a street very much like the one you're driving down, someone deeply close to your heart has lost the ability walk? Not only do these things frighten/scare/anger you when you first hear about them, but they continue to hurt everytime you're reminded of them. If, through some unfortunate circumstance, you were to experience more than one of these tragedies in a short period of time, how would you cope with them?
For many people (myself included), I think the initial reaction would be to just stop. Stop working. Stop going out. Stop reading. Stop doing whatever it is that makes you happy. The overwhelming nature of it all would just be too much. And you might even be able to make some sort of depressing rationalization for everything: "Well, if I get hit by a car tomorrow, what's the point of me working extra long hours at the office today?" "If there's a chance that I might just suddenly collapse from a heart attack in a couple years, why should I even apply to grad school?"
And honestly, if someone had presented me with those hypotheticals, I'm not sure how I'd respond. I mean, you can say "Shut up, that's just really depressing talk" or "Don't say things like that, you don't really mean that". But you really can see how someone might want to just slink off into nothingness, realizing that drastic, monumental changes can happen to you that are 100% out of your control. It's a pretty terrifying realization.
But then, I had an epiphany (not an epiphany at all, actually... I read an article on ESPN, hahaha). And with this epiphany, I realized the meaning of life. Yes, I said it, the meaning of life. And it resides in the fact that although huge, devastating things can happen, life is really all about the little things. Here's a little excerpt from the article (it's a little football-oriented; deal with it):
"When I was younger, a coach asked a team I was on, 'Have any of you ever been run over by an elephant or struck by lightning?' No one raised their hand. Then he asked us, 'Has anyone been stung by a bee?' And we all raised our hands. 'See,' he said, 'life is all about the little things.' Everyone worries about the big things, but life is about the little things. It's not about the Super Bowl but all the tiny little things you do in the process of trying to win that Super Bowl.
"When you go through the things I have, that idea really hits home: Nothing is guaranteed except this very moment, except these little things you're doing from moment to moment, so you better make them count. So I'm gonna ride this thing until the wheels fall off, until someone taps me on the shoulder and says, 'Son, that's it, you gotta go home.' And that's the feeling on this team, too. We're gonna ball till the wheels fall off."
So yes, physical and emotional trauma happens. It's terrible. But here's the thing; what makes losing someone hurt so much is the fact that we were able to have so many good memories with them. So, yes it still hurts me more than anything to think about the painful experiences that I've had in the not-too-distant past. But I know that life isn't about dwelling on the pain that you've felt. It's about sharing memories of the good times. And its about continuing to make more and more good memories, because at the end of the day, that's all you really have.
And quite frankly, that's all you need.
(here's a link to today's inspiration... this dude's a beast, and my hero of the week)
and you people wonder why i'm crazy...
Both of these notes were written in the same article; each team is only supposed to have one note written about it...
St. Louis Rams (4-4)
I've seen it happen many times. Your stars are hurt, the guys on the field raise the intensity level and win. This works, though, only if the talent drop off isn't too great, which is the situation with the poor Jets.
New York Jets (2-5)
What's the only thing worse than a struggling 41-year old quarterback? A struggling 41-year old quarterback who's nursing an injury. What's the only thing worse than a struggling 41-year old quarterback who's nursing an injury? A struggling 41-year old QB who's nursing an injury and playing behind the back-up center. What's the only thing worse ... This can go on as long as you want, depending on the space situation.
Argh...
St. Louis Rams (4-4)
I've seen it happen many times. Your stars are hurt, the guys on the field raise the intensity level and win. This works, though, only if the talent drop off isn't too great, which is the situation with the poor Jets.
New York Jets (2-5)
What's the only thing worse than a struggling 41-year old quarterback? A struggling 41-year old quarterback who's nursing an injury. What's the only thing worse than a struggling 41-year old quarterback who's nursing an injury? A struggling 41-year old QB who's nursing an injury and playing behind the back-up center. What's the only thing worse ... This can go on as long as you want, depending on the space situation.
Argh...
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